On January 11, 2020, I began writing this weekly blog again after months of inactivity by sharing why I stopped writing – chronic pain. The following week I shared what I intended to do now – write my first book. Last week I shared the SMART plan I will use to write the book. (See the February 3, 2020 blog for an explanation of the SMART plan). I was all set and eager to begin.
You know and I know that life is not that simply. I experienced a few ups and downs during this first week of research. I prayed, “Why, Jesus, why are things not going smoothly. I know you told me to do this.” The answer came in my quiet time. I was not positioned for a successful new beginning. God revealed that my lifestyle practices could and would sabotage my SMART plan to write the book if I did not make immediate changes. Those detrimental lifestyle practices and how I will overcome them are:
- Frustration – it was such a struggle to get to the library. My plan was for five days a week. This first week I was only able to get there four days. I felt I had failed myself. Then I remembered that it takes 21 days to develop a new habit. Whew! Good news! Solution – calm down. There is still time to meet my deadline.
- Sleep deprivation – because of unforeseen circumstances, I had four to five hours of sleep each night last week. When I am sleepy and tired, I do not think clearly or comprehend quickly. So, the research for my book has been slower than I would like because I had to read the same paragraph several times. Solution – give it to God and go to bed. He is the only one who can fix it anyway. I am losing sleep needlessly. I cast this care upon the Lord!
- Overcommitment – there are many worthwhile organizations, movements, groups, and fellowships. They all meet during the best time for me to research and write. It is true that each one only holds a meeting once a month, but I could be at someone’s monthly meeting three times a week. Solution – narrow my participation to a few organizations and let the rest go for now. Writing must take precedent over participation in numerous groups.
- Poor self-care practices – daily eating, taking medicine, resting, exercise, and much needed social time is a challenge now that I have added two hours of research/writing to the daily schedule. I am struggling to get it all in and still work on my book five days a week. Solution – sit down on Sunday and plan the week’s meals and activity schedule.
Having a SMART plan for writing my book is not enough. The rest of my life must be in order also. And so does yours. Are you sabotaging the dream God gave to you? Do you have some lifestyle changes to make? What are you going to do about it? Remember, God wants you to succeed and will give you the wisdom you need if you ask. Share if and what you can. #Join the conversation.
That was an on time message… A lot of these things apply to my life.. I will have some down time soon and it’s time to put things in order thanks for that message
Abundant success to you!
This was a blessing to me because I find myself frustrated at myself for not getting done things I need to. Procrastination is my biggest hindrance. Thank you Dr Haire for that insight.
Cynthia Rogers, procrastination is a big problem for many. Sometimes we have so many things to do we just can’t seem to get started. Do you think reducing the number of daily activities would help? Just a suggestion. Thank you for joining the conversation. I appreciate it.
Hi Dr. Haire, I can relate to your article as this “shoe” fits me perfectly. I know I need to take better care of myself in order to help others. God had given me wisdom and patience for others, I must apply these principles to me to be in the best position to serve others.
I wish you abundant success as you apply these principles to yourself.
This article prompted me to really look at changes I need to make in my life. My self care needs a lot of TLC! Caring for a growing, active family leaves little room for many extra commitments. However, I pray that I am doing what God requires before, or while doing what is necessary! Thank you Dr. Haire for continuing to be transparent with the issues you face and by providing your readers with reasonable solutions to implement for positive change!
I appreciate you joining the conversation. Patricia, you must put you in your schedule in order to give quality care to your family. A little “me- time” is necessary for all women who wear multiple hats. God bless you!
Thank you for bring to my attention how we sabotage ourselves. Over commitment and the lack of proper self care in order to make others dreams come true. Wow!!!! something to think about!!!!
Linda, thank you for joining the conversation.
Wow! This was great insight, thank you for sharing your journey with us. Your an amazing Teacher and example to so many
Juan Conway, you are an amazing teacher also. I love your teaching style (visual, auditory, and tactile). May God continue to use you mightily.
Ha!!! Dr. Haire, you all up in my kool-aid!!! LOL One of the hardest things for me to accept this year is that I must stay the course in the things that God has assigned me to do. In order to do that, I have had to say no to people I love dearly. I have had to say no to invites that I was honored to be considered for. I have had to say no to my flesh that is always desiring way more attention than it needs.
Thank you for sharing your heart with us! Blessings to you. I look forward to reading your book.
Karen Jethroe, you are absolutely correct. Staying the course is HARD! Instead of family, friends, and associates getting offended because you said “no, they should applaud you for staying focused. Nevertheless, obey God!
Overwork is my downfall. All I can do is give to God and let Him show me the way.
LOL. I hear you, Stephanie.
Thank you Dr. Haire
I know that I find myself taking on more projects then I should. I do well for awhile then find myself back in the same place. This blog comes as a reminder to start this year off RIGHT! PACE YOURSELF!!
Kavetta Freese, “PACE YOURSELF” should be the first item on my daily calendar and things-to-do- lists. Thank you.
Dr. Haire, thank you for sharing your process and solutions. I believe one of the worst things we can do in life is to do
“ a lot” without getting “what’s most important “ done! Since salvation, it’s always been a strategy of our enemy to keep us off God’s timetable for our lives. Thank you for reminding us of this fact and the necessity to make the best choices for our life schedule. It does take a plan!
Pastor Wilma, thank you for joining the conversation. I appreciate it. In the past I have yielded to the enemy’s strategy and got off the timetable God gave to me. I can have joy today, however, because He is a God who can redeem the time for me. I am trusted that He will!
In 2020 I am learning well trying to learn how to put ME first and realizing it’s ok to say No to work, church, family and friends. I’m striving to live by this and I pray it helps someone else: “Take care of You so no one else has to”. Thank you Dr. Haire for your transparency and continue to focus on completing your book we’re waiting.
I pray that you have abundant success in “self-care.” Jesus took time to rest and it is okay if we do also.
I’m learning to take one step at a time. I realize I can make plan but God is in control. I must trust him when He takes me in a different direction. Sometimes I too get frustrated but immediately say okay God l trust your plan. It’s God’s plan that will prevail.
Thanks Dr Haire for reminding us to take a deeper look at ourselves.
Thank you, Pastor Coleman, for joining the conversation. I appreciate it.
Thank you, Dr. Haire, for this excellent blog. As I read your blog I thought about how I overextend myself. I thought about the fact that I need to be realistic when scheduling my days. There is so much work to get done. I believe if I move faster or organize myself better I can get it done. I may get everything done but I’ve made a lot of sacrifices including but not limited to my hearing from God, my health, family and friends, etc. Everything I’m sacrificing is what’s really important to me. Thank you for making me think.
Linda Malone, that is great revelation you just shared with us: “Everything I’m sacrificing is what’s important to me.” That makes many of us think. Thanks for joining the conversation.
For me SMART is this Singing My Adorations Richly Throughout. And since I can’t sing (well I can but you don’t want to hear that) “Singing” means writing poetry. So I made a commitment of writing one poem focused on the PERSON of Jesus Christ per week. I plan on picking one poem to share with the writer’s monthly group. Thanks for the inspiration, Dorothy!
Thank you, Christal. I am so glad you joined the conversation.
Dr Haire I find myself trying to take care of others that I don’t sit down and ask God what he want me to do. I pray and ask for direction for my life but don’t spend time to listen to God to see what he want tell me. There are some many things going on in my head and sometimes I get overwhelmed and still don’t do what I should be doing. I am the older sister in my family and when things happen, I’m the one that family look to. I want to step back, but then my head says its family and I should do all I can for family. I find myself too tired to set aside quality time by reading Gods Word, meditation & praying like I should, and when I do decide most of the time I’m find it hard to focus. I need & I want that time for God and me. I know God want me to succeed but I’m allowing me to get in the way. Your advice will be most appreciative.
Yvonne, you have to make up your mind that time with God must have priority over everything else. Start small. Maybe at first you can only spend ten minutes in prayer each day. Then pray five minutes and be still and listen five minutes. Gradually increase the time.Turn the phone off during this time. God will meet you if you stay consistent. He wants to speak to you by His Spirit. Abundant blessings to you.
Thank you Dr Haire will take your advice to heart
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